A child is born
for one voice: version for five voices here
message from our sponsor:
for I bring you good tidings of great joy
which shall be to you and all mankind
in this season of goodwill
which in keeping with our policy of inclusion
we do not connect explicitly
with any particular major world religion.
A little apprehensive, maybe.
Curious—that works too.
Even mild interest would be welcome in some quarters.
unto us a child is born.
So that we can be sure
this child will meet your personal needs and expectations for a Messiah
please select from the following optional features.
us a son is given.
If your preference was for a daughter
please complete our alternative Daughter Of God questionnaire.
For a gender-free option visit our website.
name shall be
□ Wonderful Counsellor, Everlasting Father, the Mighty God, the Prince of Peace
□ Anything you like as he will be dead soon enough
will be born in
□ Bethlehem of Judaea, for you O Bethlehem are not least among the Princes of
□ Bethlehem, West Bank
□ a refugee camp far from his family home
race and colour shall be
□ White Caucasian
□ something you’d rather not sit next to on a plane
□ the colour of bloody genocide
will be born
□ of a virgin
□ to a couple with two incomes and a series of unsatisfactory Croatian au pair girls
□ with anger and little hope
□ with HIV
will find the babe
□ wrapped in swaddling clothes lying in a manger
□ in his nursery with teddy
□ in a house marked with bullet holes
□ in a shallow grave
□ come from the East
□ sign him up early for a good prep school or start attending their local Anglican church
□ regard him as a potential terrorist
□ leave well alone as the region has no oil
will bring him gifts of
□ gold, frankincense and myrrh
□ bombs and rockets
□ debt, drought and disease
the government will be
□ on his shoulders
□ on his conscience
□ on his case
□ on vacation somewhere nice
□ save his people from their sins
□ achieve the required grades for Oxbridge
□ seek asylum in someone else’s country
□ fight for his life
□ reign on the throne of his father David forever
□ enjoy a successful portfolio career
□ die on a suicide mission
□ die through neglect
go now to
Which will you find:
□ A baby born to rule?
□ A refugee and exile?
□ A boy born to die too young?
the odd one out?
the Christ child—
Immanuel, God with us
a refugee king
from a heavenly home.
in occupied country,
born to be hated,
fear of his mother,
driven to exile,
pursued to the end.
assisted to suicide,
trapped by expedience,
betrayed by a friend.
the Christ child
living among us,
God become man
with his power writ small.
Child in the manger,
infant of Mary,
outcast and stranger,
Lord of all.
carol service at
A version scripted for five voices is here. When being performed the "multiple choice" section should be projected on a screen using Powerpoint or the equivalent, and it may be helpful to introduce each of the multiple choice answers with (a) (b) (c) and (d).
The last four lines (in italics) are from the carol "Child in the manger" by Mary McDonald (1789-1872).
Typical performance time: 3 minutes 40 seconds.